On Christmas Eve, I was stranded in a snowed-in airport with a 102-degree fever when my mother texted, “We’re boarding the private jet for Aspen—try not to ruin our holiday with your whining.” while my brother laughed, “Your sister is the real star of the family; you’re just the one who pays the taxes.” They mocked me in the family group chat while charging a $48,000 ski vacation to my corporate accounts. As their jet landed in Aspen, police officers were waiting in the resort lobby while my family stood there with no money, no rooms, and nowhere left to hide.

“Not anymore, kid,” one of the officers said, reaching for his cuffs. “It looks like your ‘Foundation’ just gave way. And it’s a long way down.”

Cliffhanger: As Ryan desperately tried to call my personal line, the call didn’t even go to voicemail. A robotic, digital voice announced: ‘The number you have dialed is no longer in service. All communication regarding the Sterling Estate must now be directed through Sterling Legal Associates. Have a productive holiday. Goodbye.’