My husband said he was going to the christening of a client’s son. I followed him to an estate in Upstate New York and saw my cousin holding the baby. Then the priest smiled and said: “Now, let the father of the child step forward.” And Damian, my husband, walked to the altar in his peach-colored shirt.

His face crumbled.

He finally looked tired.

Not remorseful.

Tired of being caught.

“I loved you,” he said.

I believed him.

That was the saddest part.

I think Damian loved me at some point. But he loved me the way some men love: as long as you’re not in the way, as long as you pay, as long as you believe, as long as you don’t ask too many questions.